Thursday, October 28, 2004
(5:54 PM) | Adam Kotsko:
Proposal for Next Election
No polls next time. I want both candidates to go into election day completely blind, and I want the public to go in blind, too. I don't want polls of likely voters or registered voters. No polls of perceived debate victories or candidate favorability shall be allowed, nor shall breakdown polls of how the public likes the candidates' positions on various issues. The candidates should get up and say either (a) what they themselves believe to be the best way to go or (b) what their party and/or sponsors believe to be the best way to go. No patronizing attempts to craft one's views according to the preferences of uninformed people shall be performed -- there's a reason that we hire people to be in government, and it's because we expect them to be better informed than someone taking a poll who feels pressured to have an opinion and therefore makes something up on the spot.No journalist shall ever make a generalization about whether an opinion expressed by a candidate resonates with the national mood. No color-coding of states shall be permitted. David Brooks shall be locked in a closet for the entire election process, and for the rest of his natural life afterward. The words "conservative" and "liberal" shall be banned from the American lexicon for a period of four years. Any sign of Manichean dualism shall be punished in a suitably medieval fashion. Any discussion of the candidates' religious faith shall result in the candidate(s) being executed and replaced. Speculation on the death of Supreme Court justices shall be punished by fine and/or imprisonment. If a candidate says something false, journalists shall point that out and guage the seriousness of the falsehood. The same process shall be followed in a debate.
And let's make the election process shorter. It's been fucking months! It's too fucking much!
