Tuesday, March 15, 2005
(8:34 PM) | F. Winston Codpiece III:
Coming out of the closet of guilt and shame
I have received countless electronic mail inquiries as to my supposed "real-life" identity. Apparenly some of my readers do not find it plausible that a person by the name of F. Winston Codpiece III actually exists, and they assume that it is a pseudonym. Some of them even call into question the general veracity of my adventures, as documented here and more extensively at The H is O.Certainly it may be difficult to accept the idea that, as an heir to great wealth with an early interest in Hegel, I was able to scathingly critique Adam Smith, deftly referee a hypothetical fight between Sergei Rachmaninoff and Camille Saint-Saens, strongly imply that I was involved in a pederastic relationship with Ronald Raegan in my youth, ruminate on The World Historical Significance of The H is O, celebrate the inclusion of female bloggers in the formerly all-male H is O, get saved after getting it on, and vote for George W. Bush on the basis of his masturbation policies after having decided to vote for John Kerry based on an incident involving organ harvesting. I have also written a guide to masturbation and impregnated Kamala the Ugandan Giant -- among many other things, the posts relating which I am tired of tracking down.
"It's not impossible that all those things are true, but it is certainly, shall we say, unlikely," says a hypothetical critic. I don't have to mention that this critic himself or herself does not exist at all, so that my decision to respond at all is much more than such a critic deserves, but respond I shall:
You're absolutely right. This is a pseudonym. And the time has come to reveal my true identity: I am Belle Waring, the Seductress of Singapore. Already a contributor to John and Belle have a blog and Crooked Timber, along with other undisclosed blogs (...ever heard of "Glenn Reynolds," by the way?), I was greedy for ever more of the power and influence only the blogosphere could provide. Of course, m2, naive incipient Calvinist that he is, could not resist my tantalizing wiles -- after all, I had pulled out all the stops and donned my blonde wig. Yet the relatively small readership of The H is O, combined with the awkwardness produced by my insistence on blogging the intimate details of my relationship with my husband John "Kamala the Ugandan Giant" Holbo, made me want to branch out. Mr. Kotsko was more than willing to oblige -- I didn't even have to put on the wig for him.
The secret has burdened his very soul, as well as mine, and so it is time, and past time, for me to reveal my identity, which I will reiterate: Belle Waring, the Seductress of Singapore.
I will, of course, continue blogging here as usual. My only request is that no one send a permalink of this post to my in-laws, who revel in "cramping" my "style."
