Wednesday, October 11, 2006
(9:45 AM) | Adam Kotsko:
Class Preparation
In a couple weeks, I am apparently going to be in charge of an entire three-hour class on Eastern Orthodoxy. Obviously I'm going to have to find a few ways to kill some time. The best way would be to incorporate a PowerPoint presentation. I could arrange with the library (or whoever is in charge of such things) to bring in the projector five minutes after class starts, then act like there was some problem getting it to work with my computer. With any luck, one of the computer-oriented students would offer to help, only adding to the confusion. Finally, when we'd get the video working, I could fake a separate problem with the sound -- because of course no PowerPoint on Eastern Orthodoxy would be complete, would even make sense, without monks chanting in the background. Time wasted: 20-30 min.Then, on the verge of actually beginning the presentation, I would remember that I was supposed to hand back papers. Since graduate students spontaneously form seating charts, it would be a simple matter to stack the papers so as to require the maximum time of walking back and forth while handing them back. Time wasted: 10 min.
After this has been completed, the only real opportunity for wasting time would be to take excessive questions -- yet PowerPoint lulls students into complacency. Perhaps the best strategy, then, would be to get through the PowerPoint as quickly as possible, bringing us up to break time. The break could obviously be extended if I was seen outside the seminary, frantically talking on the cell phone -- that alone could carve out an additional five to ten minutes of the second half of the class, perhaps even more if I can come up with an amusing story for why I was detained on the phone.
At this point, my true genius is displayed, for this is when we begin the Group Activity. First, we can waste time "counting off," then I can cultivate some confusion about where each particular group is supposed to meet. For the rest of the class, the students themselves will handle the time-wasting functions, and I can stand up at the podium, apparently working on paperwork, but actually playing Hangman against myself.
