Friday, October 12, 2007
(4:56 PM) | Brad:
Football Blogging: The Week That Was & Is To Come
Last week, my football-loving heart was ripped out repeatedly. It started on Thursday, when Steve "I Can't Help But Love the Motherfucker" Spurrier put a hurting on my beloved UK Wildcats in the rain. Things got a little better when Stanford knocked off USC down in L.A., until I realized that would put Ohio State at number three in the country. And then I got depressed all over again. Please, Big 10 ... somebody, please beat this team. Knock them back to the den of mediocrity that the rest of you inhabit. (Oh, and who the hell are the two coaches who put OSU at #1 on their USA Today poll sheet? Over LSU, really? I had no idea they let meth addicts coach these days.)There was nothing remarkable any of Sunday's games -- except for the fact that I was spectacularly wrong in all but one of last week's five picks. I can live with that. What I've yet to come to terms with is the Dallas-Buffalo game on Monday night. I have a very good friend who is a Bills fan, and over the years have developed a certain affection for the team (or, at the very least, their long-suffering fans). With each Romo interception, I felt a little more hope. And yet, the Bills simply could not score a touchdown and create any kind of lead that seemed at all safe. As the clock ticked, my sphincter tightened all the more. I became increasingly incoherent. Stammering to my wife, bellowing at the dog, typing in all caps to friends online. And then ... the moment I knew that Dallas would win. Buffalo was leading and driving, and they tried and failed running an inexplicable reverse .... on 3rd & 1. I shrieked, I cried, I spilled my cereal. It was like when you're playing Madden Football, and you unknowingly hit the button for the wrong play. At that point, I'd lost all faith in the Buffalo coaching staff actually to win the game. This lack of faith was confirmed when they had their rookie QB pass on 3rd & 8 just outside Dallas' 10-yard-line. Six minutes left ... a field goal puts you up eleven ... and you're throwing into the teeth of a jam-packed defense? Take the points, I blubbered, near the point of mental, physical, and spiritual exhaustion. And then, during the final play just before the game-winning fieldgoal as time expired: no pressure on Romo (in spite of the fact he'd been knocked around like Tina Turner all game), and their DBs playing so far away from line that you'd think they were parolled sexual predators playing a local peewee football team? If you're going to lose, lose playing defense! When all was over, I was a drunken mess -- bottles of beer collapsed at my feet, alongside my dignity and self-respect. My wife and dog, staring at me in a mixture of pity and indifference.
A friend asked me if the excitement of that game redeemed ESPN's coverage of Monday Night Football. My response: an unqualified absolutely not.
Considering I did so badly in my picks last week, I should at least try to redeem myself this week. Once again, I'll pick five games, and see how much worse I can get:
Cincinnati (-3) @ Kansas City: This Cincy team is bad. I know it. You know it. And, this is important, I think even they're starting to finally accept it. That's crucial for them to get any better. They've carried this whole embattled "we're better than everybody else on paper" line two seasons too long. It's done. They're bad. But ... I think Kansas City is worse.
Minnesota (+5) at Chicago: With most NFC games you can just flip a coin. I did here, and don't at all bad about the potential for an upset. No matter that Chicago will stack eleven people on the line and likely kill Adrian Peterson.
Philadelphia at NY Jets (+3.5): The Jets aren't a very good football team, but I still don't think they're as bad as their record indicates. They had the Giants beaten, were it not for Pennington doing his best Brett Favre impression. Anyway, when in doubt, until further notice, when it's two bad teams, I'm going to take the AFC team at home.
Tennessee (+2.5) at Tampa Bay: Nope. I'm not getting roped into picking a NFC South team at home. Not even against a Tennessee team that was one Albert Haynesworth smashed skull away from losing to Atlanta.
New England (-5.5) at Dallas: Two reasons for this. One, I've seen no reason to bet against New England. Two, I've seen no reason to have more faith in Romo than I do in Brady when it comes to a game as big as this. And three, I watched Buffalo dance through Dallas' linebackers for extra yards all game on Monday. If I saw that, so did NE's cameras.
(Extra pick: if Seattle can't beat New Orleans at home by more than a TD, they should be relegated to the CFL. I'm still pissed at this team for letting me down last week in Pittsburgh.)
