Monday, August 18, 2003
(7:25 PM) | Adam Kotsko:
Tom DeLay and Adam Kotsko: Fast Friends
Many of you may be surprised to see an America-hating leftist firebrand such as Adam Kotsko claiming friendship with Tom DeLay, renowned conservative. I'm coming to realize, however, that the conservative propaganda is actually correct: the liberal media is significantly slanted in their presentation of Mr. DeLay. He has a heart of gold, but not the hard kind of gold -- his golden heart is of the cuddly variety. I discovered this when he was in town promoting his upcoming historical novel, When Fellatio Was King. Loosely based on his experiences as a White House intern during the Clinton years, this novel is sure to be a hit worldwide, a welcome addition to the canon of semi-fictional presidential novels such as Primary Colors or Ulysses.
We met at Burrito Loco. I had the large beef burrito, and he had a couple of chicken tacos, because, he joked, chicken is "healthier." We had a good laugh over that, given that both of us are opposed to the bleeding-heart liberal crusade to make America into a healthy, energetic nation characterized by "wellness." Revelling in the racial diversity of the restaurant (Mexicans and white people!), we began to discuss contemporary political events. When I asked him about the cowardly Democrats in Texas who had fled to New Mexico in order to postpone the inevitable Republican takeover of all our political institutions, he was philosophical. He was concerned not so much with his own political ambitions as with the integrity of our constitutional system.
"Adam," he said, "we're supposed to, by Constitution, apportion or redistrict every 10 years. The state legislature in Texas couldn't do it in the last legislature, and three judges did it and they did a very poor job, as evidenced that the fact that we have a minority of Republicans in our congressional delegation."
"Wait," I said, "are you confessing that you wanted to redistrict solely because you wanted the Republicans to be in the majority in the Texas congressional delegation? Are you assuming that people always vote a straight party ticket?"
"What -- you know, we in Texas, Adam, have prided ourselves on honor, duty and responsibility. Unfortunately, the Democrats in the state legislature don't understand honor because they're violating their oath of office to support the United States Constitution. They don't understand their duty, which the Constitution calls for in redistricting. And they don't want to accept responsibility for it, so they ran. "
"It's the Democrats' duty to support a measure explicitly intended to undermine their party's power, and thus to insure that the kinds of policies they promote and that they think to be best for the American people will not be passed?"
He paused, then added, "We're insisting that the Constitution be upheld, and we feel very confident that if the state legislature does its duty and redistricts, then we will end up with a majority of Republicans in the congressional delegation."
That satisfied me. Here, the liberal media was portraying him as a megalomaniac bent on increasing Republican power, and here, in his own words, I could hear that the real megalomaniacs were the Republicans who apparently wrote the Constitution and inserted clauses specifying that the Republicans should, whenever practicable, hold the majority in every state congressional delegation. I mean, as a good American citizen, I have never read the Constitution, but I assume that people in congress have to at some point, so I just took his word for it. I asked him to pass the hot sauce, and the topic of conversation shifted away from politics.
But I will never forget that day when Tom DeLay poured out his heart, the heart of a true patriot, a heart made of cuddly gold, to me, Adam Kotsko, America-hating leftist firebrand and editor of American Heritage magazine.
