(11:54 PM) | Adam R:

Down and Out in Milwaukee: ATR's Survival Guide

1. What's most essential is the environment where you spend the your time. On several occasions during my new broke-spell, I haven't had enough change to scrounge together to go out for a cup of coffee, or to get to get to the library, so I dallied all day in my room. I'd like to say I read voraciously, or worked on my three volume novel, or drafted the best conceivable resume, but I'd be lying. I woulda, though, if my damn room had been clean. Instead I just sat on my bed or on the floor hugging my dog, Thunder. We shivered together as the wind and snow blew through my storm window-less window. Finally, though, I tidied up and now look at me: I've got a job interview on Tuesday! It's with Mad Science.
2. What's not important is your stuff. Trust me. I've been eBaying everything of value that I own (unless it was a gift, Mom). It is the single most liberating thing I've done in my life. I never realized how much expensive crap I have. I sold a Danelectro re-issue for $150, probably made some teenager cream his pants. But the thing sounded like shit to me. I sold a White Stripes CD for $15. There's one born every minute.
   
3. No matter how smart you think you are, if you don't have any money you can get food stamps. And it only takes about 45 minutes. And then you can stop eating potato soup all the time. But if you want to eat it once in a while, here is the recipe: Dice five or six potatoes, brown them in a soup pot, cover them (plus an inch) with water, boil them and then simmer. Salt to taste.
4. To be a good friend, have good friends. Friends will take me out to dinner or for coffee two or three times in a row, so I like to repay them by making some soup. Here's the biggest trick, though: whenever you have money, always, always spend it on your friends. I figure that I owe them big time. Probably they don't think that -- at least not "big time" -- so my reciprocity might look a tiny bit like generosity. That, however, is due to their graciousness more than my puppy dog eyes.
   
5. Going to bars is a good idea. It's expensive, though, so try to make your toothpaste last longer. Don't do your laundry. Use an old onion bag for a dish rag. Do whatever is necessary to spend at least $10 a week at the corner tavern. You will feel connected that way.
6. Style is important. If you aren't going to do your laundry, it's important to have five or six cheap suits that you can choose from for when you have hit rock-bottom scuzziness. I recently came back from a four-day trip during which I didn't shower at all. I reeked and I even felt gross, which is strange for me. I soaked for a while when I got home, then put on a nice suit that I bought for $5 at the Value Village. I felt like a king as I sat on my bed hugging my dog.
7. Ken Burns is better than 24, but I have to admit, 24 is engaging and addictive.

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