Wednesday, March 09, 2005
(11:21 PM) | Anonymous:
DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT YOU SHIT PISSER: Sovereignty, What's Really Going On, and a Sweet, Cool, Pousse-cafe'
This is an introductory paragraph. The main enemies of sovereignty weren't bitches and hoes, but old men who didn't like it. Because of this they ended it effectively by forming a club. I was not invited to that club. I knocked on the door and they were like "HELL NO BITCH, GET ME SOME 'STRAMI! AND SLIDE it under the DOOR!" and I did. I did get the p-ass-strami. But I pronounced it like I just did. I said "Look, here's your p-ass-strami. Enjoy your girly club." I walked away snickering. How I snickered, but I didn't know that inside, sovereignty was having it's fertile crescent penetrated by a Brett Butler baseball card. And he used to chew a lot of tobacco. This is a topic sentence: oh shit.Sovereignty, Sovereignty - IT IS what we long for. These will be supporting sentences. The articles to this point have been incredible, indelible, ineffable, incongruous, ingenious, in-ass. BUT NO ONE IS TALKING about the enemy of sovereignty. What do we have so far in this conference? Who can we pin up and jerk off too as our great evil? Certainly not the annual first issue of the Harvard LAW REVIEW. Certainly not Doug Johnson's WIFE Jodie BOYer! Certainly not BOB JONES, the Greek word Nomos, Torah-as-pedigogue, The CIVIL WAR? COME ON! What's that Brad? THE ENEMY IS Matthew 28:18? The enemy is immanent materiality? The enemy is the OBJECT of theological materiality? THE ENEMY is Daft Punk's "HArder, Faster, Stronger"? The enemy is the excess that emerges from and paradoxically sustains the desire of ITS suicidal self-violence? Oh great leader, what do you propose? Prefaces? Short Fragments? Analogies of the sovereign as sun? Anthopology of the Old Testament? Part? capital? coin? that? to? What? Outside?
FOlks, you have simply missed the point, you boobs. These things and prepositions and joinders are not the enemy.
Look, I have scanned these articles for a good 18 seconds now, and no one is giving me an enemy. No one is talking of people I can fucking blow to the roof and then "do" in the butt just to bring a lasting shame upon them. No one is teaching me karate. No one is slapping me on the ass and calling me susie. At this point, I'd even take Souxsie. WHOOOM..got carried away there, let me backtrack, WHOM does all these things? THE SOCIETY OF THE ELECT AND THE ASSOCIATION OF THE HELPERS. CECIL RHODES. ALFRED MILNER. WILLIAM T. STEAD. REGINALD BALIOL BRETT. LORD ESHER.
THIS MEAN posse, the meanest since THE LEGION OF DOOM hung up their spiked shoulder pads, came together and formed something against sovereignty. Namely, it was a group. Secondly, some of these people were from DIFFERENT NATIONS and sovereignty collapsed. Let's take a closer look at those friends of terrorists - the enemies of sovereignty.
I AM CECIL RHODES.
I look like "Tom" from that comical game Guess Who. Does your man wear a hat? Does your woman have glasses? Is your man Tom? EBULATION! EBULATION! WE WIN! BOY I like scholars! I shall support them! I shall help them come to other countries. TO BRIDGE COUNTRIES! to make them one! To End all sovereignty. I don't like sovereignty because of what it did to my mother. I can hardly look at her boobs now that they are all lopsided and molded to resemble the head of Ethan Allen - he of the green mountain boys. MAN he had big ears. Yet, I still look. Yet, I still look. SOVEREIGNTY MUST DIE! Just like Romeo. Except without Jet Li. Or Chow-Yun Fat. Or Ethan Hawke and other chinese people. We will use Slavs. Nothing but glorious SLAVS everywhere! See their work ethic! See their lowered brow! See their generous portions of mashed potatoes! See their GIGANTIC genitalia. We shall end all sovereignty with action/romance kung-pow films starring slavs! STELLAN SKARSGAARD WHERE YOU BE? We shall cross over with DMX. We will act the fool. Aaliyah will not die, not in our revolution. I AM CECIL RHODES - I make no jokes of my first name.
I AM ALFRED MILNER.
THEY call me KOol Rapest Miln. I rape combat boots. Girth is my game. Willy-nilly hoochie-hoery is my game. I AM LEFT LOTS OF MONEY BY THE CECIL. I Am the 1st Viscount. Of snatch. Alfred "1st Viscount of Snatch" Milner. I administrate colonies like they were clothing pins to be equally distributed amongst the masses. OH WHATS THAT? YOU WANT TO BE SOVEREIGN? Don't we all, you fucking little glossy eyed starlet whore automoton. I, together with Rhodes, will become elect. I, along with others, shall be helpers. Don't you want to help? Don't you want your countries tourism enhancement video shot with Goldfrapp's "Strict Machine" in the background? Don't you want dancing girls gyrating on top of phalic Little Caesars' men? What was the song? Hattie told Mattie? Not Ted leo..the old one. With the Little Caesar's Caesar singing? Anyway, don't you want them humping Kylie Minogue in your video? JOIN US. I AM ALFRED MILNER. I AM NOT ALFRED MILLER. Recognize bi-gotch. Be gotch. Be gootch. Be fucking fan-trastic!
I AM William T. Stead.
I EDITED THE NORTHERN ECHO. I did not design the video game ECCO. I don't deal in dolphins. What fun is controlling a dolphin? If I created a video game you would control Mildred Langworthy. You would be being violated. And I'd play me, and I'd rescue you with EDITORIAL BRAGGADOCIO! I would hook that shit up to XBOX LIVE. ANd I would be the only one allowed to play me. And people would line up by the literal thousands of bousands to play Mildred. I'd save you all. I hate LADY SOVEREIGN. Because she is brittish. And she is in on that whole fuckin' "Grime" scene of hip hop. OH NO YOU DIDN'T BLAZE ON AMERICAN RAP. AMERICAN RAP PARTIES ARE THE BEST NATIONAL RAP PARTIES BECAUSE AMERICAN RAP PARTIES DONT STOP. Lady sovereign, why you trying to blaze on Just Blaze? Why do you sound like Bea Arthur? I will destroy you. I really hate Bulgarian atrocities. I really hate Gay Danish Man. Because he's bulgarian. By virtue of the write in vote of his father. Smear the lipstick on the boy all you want, he's still sexy enough to make me cut off my penis to avoid..never mind. I hate Bulgarians. I hate Bulge-Aryans. Seriously, is there anything less attractive than a fat nazi? W.E. Gladstone has adhered to me in this cause. WT and WE. WE Gladstone and Joey Gladstone. Ranger Joe, Joe, Joe, Ranger Joe, Joe, Joe - he's the funniest guy I know. Ranger Joe, Joe, Joe.
Ok - cut (scissor motion). it (ambiguous "it" pointing motion). out (Umpire-esque "out" motion). In the Review Of Reviews we don't review reviews, we just invoke biblical terminology - because the world loves us. And this is why I truly hate SOVEREIGNTY - I really, really, really get my dig on Esperanto. Kiel vi fartas? Kiu parolas? Por kio? Mi estas 27-jara. Mi havas kapdoloron! Ni kisu. Cicoj and Fekaĵo. Yes, tits and shit baby. TIts and shit are my delicacy. Cicoj and Fekajo. Forever. And ever. SOVEREINGTY can go Fiki its Peniso Atendu momenton... I don't know the word for "In the thyroid gland", but if I did, it would.
I AM REGINALD BALIOL BRETT.
I wrote boring books about boring people. This made people realize how boring they were and give up and give in to non-sovereignty. I'm a real mother fucker. You don't say much about the REAL mother fuckers.
I AM LORD ESHER.
I released upon the nation Little John. I have abs that were surgically implanted. I was on "Light It Up". I think I took the school hostage, or saved hostages in the school, or made clever puns about other teen movies, or got a surgically replaced arm and caught a ball at wrigley field and when I threw it back it was so good they signed me as a catcher even though I was underaged. I did all of these things. I once said something that ended with "...we might have been landed with something like the American Senate". I don't know what I said first, because I cannot get Google's cache feature to work. I bet it was "Thank God I didn't eat that ball of Ox scrotum wax, or...".
I bet it was.
Remember that one video where it was like a circus and my eye was all painted weird? In a sovereign state, that sort of testicle juice doesn't see the airwaves. I HATE sovereignty. ALSO - in reading this, I just found out that Reginald Baliol Brett WAS Lord Esher. I misread the source material. Hell if I'm going back to erase these fine quality jokes about Usher though. Oh, hey, while I'm at it, why don't I throw in some Michael Jackson jokes. HEY EVERYBODY!!! UM...LITTLE KIDS..WERE LIKE>>WALKING..NO NO NO WAIT I GOT IT I REMEMBER>..UM THEY WERE HAVING AN EASTER EGG HUNT, and one of them looked for an egg in Michael's room, and he DID THEM IN THE ASS! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I'm so sending that into Readers Digest's "Laughter In Uniform" section. I am in the uniform worn by all No-Pants Commandos. ANd our little kids regiment often draws attention from... no, not Conrad from Linkin Park...but MICHAEL JACKSON! HA HA HAHAHA THE FUNNY REIGNS AGAIN RIGHT NOW.
Wait. They don't love you like I love you. Come back.
In the most general sense of progressive thought, the Enlightenment has always aimed at liberating men from fear and establishing their sovereignty. Yet the fully enlightened earth radiates disaster triumphant. Science, technology, rationalism rather are blamed for this disaster. "Enlightenment is more totalitarian than any system" – whether Stalinist, Fascist or Capitalist. The domination of nature ultimately extends to the domination of men. Enlightenment behaves towards things as a dictator towards men: it knows them in so far as he can manipulate them. This dialectic of Enlightenment consists in that liberation from the domination of nature resulted in new forms of domination. The liquidation of the individual is the outcome of the subordination of nature to humanity. Enlightened thought and reason attack myth and superstition, but only to create its own mythology. No universal history leads from savagery to humanitarianism, but there is one leading from the slingshot to the megaton bomb. Adorno aimed to rescue the individual, the particular, the “non-identical” from both the totalising impulse of philosophical systems (such as Hegel’s) and the totalitarian regimes. “The whole is the untrue” he famously wrote. Adorno differed from classical Marxism in so far as he blamed “instrumental reason” (the logic of science, technology and industry) rather than specifically capitalism for those disasters, however his analysis relied heavily on Marxian categories like commodity fetishism, exchange value, reification. The value of Adorno’s writings lies on how he used those categories to analyse new forms of capitalist domination and social phenomena.
Sehr freaky! Ein bisschen zu freaky für mich... Aber Sovereignty is ja auch ne zweigeteilte. Ich hör da lieber die Werke von BIG BOI! Unbedingt hören: Unhappy
hehe mir gefiels...kommt cool mit diesem klimberkeyboard
crazy
edit: auf 6 sterne erhöht.
Erhöht, bitches.
