Sunday, October 21, 2007
(12:59 AM) | Brad:
NFL Mediocrity .... It's Faaaaantastic
I'm kind of phoning in this week's football post. Sorry. The in-laws arrived this week, and I've been (or at least felt) kind of distracted since Wednesday. Hopefully I'll find some kind of rhythm in the midst of the football madness tomorrow. I didn't even feel all that into tonight's college games -- except for the tremendous Auburn-LSU game. Really looking forward to a Florida-LSU rematch in the SEC championship.Yes, for those keeping track of my love for the University of Kentucky's football program, it was painful to see them fall by eight to Florida. But the worst part of the ordeal was that they couldn't cover the spread. Sadness reigned in the hearts of betting Wildcat fans everywhere who played the gambling homer.
(Interesting anecdote about the merits of betting for & against your own team. I went to a really gritty and urban sports bar in Oakland last week for the Pats-Cowboys game, and was treated to the following conversation while at the toilet: "Man ... I need the Raiders to let LT score another TD?" "Yeah ... wait, you're a Raider fan, aren't you?" "Yeah, but I gotta get paid." "Yeah, but you ain't gonna call your daughter a slut just 'cause she's a ho. You gotta stick w/ your team!" The wisdom of urinal trough talk.]
Also, for the two of you who read this post, you may have already noted that I'm absolutely horrible at picking games. Two weeks ago, I was 1-4; last week, I was 2-3. I'm pretty happy I wasn't picking games the first five weeks of the season, otherwise Vegas would be bankrupt from people just taking the opposite pick as me. But, hey, like my marriage, I'm committed to failure. So, I'm going to stick with this for the season. So, in the nick of time before the Sunday afternoon kickoffs ....
1) I'm taking New Orleans (-9) at home to cover the spread against Atlanta. I see the rationale for calling this a "return to reality" game for the Bubba Gump Shrimps, coming on the heels of the spanking they put on Seattle in one of Bill Gates' perfectly manicured back yards. But, hey, maybe it's time for the Saints' WRs to start catching and their offensive line to give Brees more time in the pocket. If not now, against the Falcons, New Orleans will not be favored by more than 2.5 all year.
2) I would never put any money on this, but I'm really looking for San Francisco (+9) to pull the upset on the Giants. It just seems one of those inexplicable NFC losses. The only thing that keeps me from putting money on this is Plaxico Burress, who is showing a level of consistency rivaled only by the frequency of my Sunday football conversations that at some point bring up Eli Manning's resemblance to a feminine hygiene product.
3) How the hell are the Bengals a 6.5 favorite over the Jets? This just seems absolutely insane. J-E-T-S. JETS JETS JETS.
4) Speaking of batshit insane lines, Pittsburgh only a 2.5-point favorite over Denver? Okay, sure, it's in Denver. But I seem to remember the Steelers beating Denver IN DENVER a couple of years ago in a game whose implications were slightly larger (not least because the Ravens will continue to play their schedule that consists of junior high female football teams, and they will still finish the AFC North in second) -- and that Denver team was actually pretty good. This one sucks so bad even Adam won't call them for a second date.
5) This Minnesota-Dallas game is killing me. Dallas is going in a 9.5-point favorite, which screams "take the underdog," esp. coming on the heels of Adrian Peterson proving definitively, for the legion of naysayers, that he is a better RB than Cedric Benson. And yet, I really think Dallas will come out wanting to prove something. That something being, "Hey, we can barely beat mediocre AFC teams, and cannot hold a great AFC team below 40-points, but we can sure as hell beat up on the NFC!" I think this one is going to be like the great unaired episode of Malcolm in the Middle, where Hal, after getting fired again from his job and unable to perform sexually, and decides to beat Dewey into protective custody.
Oh... and yes, I cannot go w/out some comment on the Indy-Jags game. In my heart, I know that Manning & co. will come out and win by 17 -- it being Monday Night Football and all. But, I couldn't watch the game if I actually picked this to happen. So, screw it, I say: the Jags are taking advantage of the three points they're being given. A far more interesting side-bet, I think, is whether M. Jones-Drew follow up last week's performance with a similar/better performance, or does he fade back into his Season Two doldrums?
