Thursday, April 08, 2004
(7:17 AM) | Anonymous:
The Drones Work Hard Before They Die
This is my first posting on the new yellow page. I'm totally "digging" the new look, along with the new outlook on life I've gained because of the new look.Before going on, I think I should relate something. The other week, we were assigned a group project in my public administration class, to creatively show how leadership and decision making were demonstrated in the movie "13 Days". This was quite possibly the strangest assignment ever, but consider that at one point the class seriously considered doing the project over "Remember the Titans" and rejoice! I had gotten there late, per usual, and thus rightfully ended up in a bit of a leftover group. The prof. emphasized again and again that humor would go a long way towards a good grade. So, we got in groups and talked about the project. The much older, ZZ top-esque, Harley riding man claimed leadership, as he already had a whole power point presentation ready. I asked him then about what avenues we should go to add humor, and his response was about the absolutely most funny and supremely awesome thing I have ever heard someone say, though it did leave me a bit of foreboding about my group, as he in total seriousness said:
"Oh no, it's plenty funny. Like..haha ha ha..just a for instance here.. ha ha ha...at the end...this logo with porky pig comes flying in from the left..ha ha haha...and like.. ha ha..spiraling around that it says "th-th-th-th-th-th-that's all folks!" and like..I think I can get a sound of that too to put in there." Which, abruptly sent my group into laughter, whatever that says of the composition of my group.
It was exceedingly hillarious, but in a way where you don't laugh as it goes on, but think of that instant for years to come.
Anyway, let's cut the chutzpah and get down to the will-he nill-he, shall we? Did we think the CD Change post had gone by the wayside we did? Well, no. It's the only consistent subject where I can say that I'll have something to say, and thus it simply must be regular if anyone but Kotsko is ever to post to this page. I cannot be Adam's equal in the scholarly fields, but as far as wide-ranging musical taste and subjecting myself to the worst and most embarassing fringes thereof on a regular basis, I've totally got the dude beat. I am reading The Ticklish Subject and understanding not a word, but here..here is my revenge, my niche, like the diorama we all built in 3rd grade, if you will. I'm pretty sure the 3rd grade diorama example would be "the one of these that isn't like the others" if a quiz was held, but for unknown reasons, that image seems to perfectly convey what I mean. So, yeah:
The Faint - Danse Macabre Remixes. I'm really not sure what "dance punk" is anymore. I've heard it describe everything from The Blood Brothers, who are terrible and scream nonstop (If I am wrong, I apologize, I only gave Burn Piano Island one listen before breaking it over my nose. This wasn't because the CD was bad, it was just my way of dealing with THE PAIN INSIDE.) to Liars, who are crazy and screaming, but to a really cool beat..to The Faint, who here, in remixed form, make the kind of music even I could find a way to dance to. Sure, it lags pretty bad somewhere in the middle..right around the Paul Oakenfold track, but I must say, I've heard 2 albums and now this song from Mr. Oakenfold and I'm beginning to think he is the key to the vast overrating of "dance" music in general, so we can't blame The Faint. Oakenfold seems to capitalize on the sort of drone that can only be tolerated when one is drunk off one's royal rocker, and at all other times is so amazingly annoying as to be snickering with erotic badness, the kind of snicker that sets in your nose like the smell of rotten grain and slowly devours your soul. It should also be noted that I don't have, nor have I listened to, the actual "Danse Macabre" album..so I can't compare the two. Maybe that's for the best.
Lo-Tel - The Lost Thing. I totally thought this was a Christian album upon listen. I don't mean Christian album in a Pedro The Lion, Starflyer 59 or even Jars of Clay way either. I mean the same sort of blasted tripe that all the Christian labels sign to fill their labels with bands that look like big mainstream bands. So, imagine my shock when the "F" word was dropped about mid-way through. I think the "B"-word followed in that same song. Turns out their just Australian. Oh, fatal island/continent - what is your deal with churning out completely marginal rock bands as of late? I mean..come on..the Vines? Silverchair? Jet? If we'd only have known you'd go there from our over-indulgence of Olivia Newton-John, ACDC and INXS, we never would have encouraged you. Is this your revenge for New Zealand getting all the love at the Oscars? If getting Peter Jackson to film The Hobbit in Australia would stop this mess, I'll gladly see what I can do.
Sigur Ros - Von I am disappointed yellow. You can either read that with Yellow as some sort of adjective to disappointed, or you can catch the play off the I Am Curious movies, which I've never seen. Either way, maybe I am a poser post-rock fan after all. Maybe I can only get into it when there seems to be less art and more..good? Sigur Ros was amazing with Agaetis Byrjun, and the newer stuff has been great too, but this, their first album which was only released in Iceland, is missing everything that makes the later good. What first "got me" about Agaetis Byrjun was the fact that is was a unique sort of music that engaged the listener without causing any suspicion. You know..you'd just be driving along, and then suddenly realize you'd totally not really been paying attention to the road the last 10 minutes as you listened to Svefn g Englar or Ny Batteri. Von never gets to that point..taking about 10 minutes on some songs to get right behind you, if I may continue the sneaking metaphor..and then it just walks away. It's like when Beavis and Butthead played Ding, Dong, Ditch..but then just stood there at the door. Or maybe the opposite, I don't know. I just know that the music on Von would work perfect as background tracks in a movie, and even be quite good in that regard. It does well to create a soundscape for you to frolic in, it just doesn't populate that area with anything of its own, and thus leaves you empty. None of the other Sigur Ros albums I've heard, including (), would work on a soundtrack, not even if you are Cameron Crowe with Vanilla Sky.
Joe Strummer & The Mescaleros - Streetcore Joe Strummer is dead, and I was never a big fan of the Clash until after he died. Heck, I still only own London Calling, to my discredit. Therefore, I'm not gonna say anything bad about the man. What's more, if I wanted to, I couldn't, because this album is pretty good. It doesn't tread too far from Clash-esque territories, but why would anyone want to. I think if I wrote anymore, it'd turn into some half-hearted try at eulogizing someone I really only liked to sing along with on 3-4 songs before he died. Then that'd remind me of the time in Jr. High when this kid I didn't know accidentally shot himself with a gun he thought wasn't loaded. Yeah, just like that episode of 90210 that we both never watched..the one where David's friend dies. Except, this guy wasn't my friend, but I made a hard sell with the paper about our "feelings" we were assigned to write, talking about how even though I didn't know the guy, we all knew "the guy" or something, and I got a semester's worth of undying sympathy from the teacher, and a receipt for my soul from satan. Thus, I quit now.
G Love & Special Sauce - G. Love & Special Sauce. God bless G. Love. I remember Freshman year of college when I was hanging out with the seniors who I thought were, and later cross-referenced as the coolest people ever to live (Lee Yowell, Lee Chambers, et. al). They put on "My Baby's Got Sauce", and I was hooked. However, for some reason I never bought the CD till recently. That's not to say I didn't have .."access" to it, just that it's so worth the cash, that I feel bad for robbin them till now. Okay, so his pseudo-name reeks of fantastically poser rock, but the grooves that come out instead are so sweet and tender that I'd kick my cat out of the bed for them. I don't think a beat is missed here. If only we could go back in time and tell G. Love that his prodigee' Jack Johnson would one day surpass him, and have a video on MTV with Ben Stiller in it..I don't know what he'd do with the information really, but he's G. Love, he'd probably just brush it off and sing a song about field mice and boomerangs.
KMFDM - Nihil A former friend sent this to me several weeks back. He said I'd like it if I liked Nine Inch Nails and Perfect Circle, one of which I find good, one of which I find pretty okay. However, he was wrong. And if it wasn't for that infamous Synkronized Brothers of the Faith album, he'd have given me the worst CD in my collection. I'm sorry, but I can't take seriously any band that uses the "scary" voice. You know what I mean right? I'm not unilaterally against screaming, or even the "whisper/scream" thing. However..when bands go through the effort of straining to the point where you can see them in the studio gesticulating and making scary motions getting "into character", I'm going to laugh, and laugh hard. Come on..scary voices were for when we still had bunk beds with our siblings, not for selling rock records. Even Juke Joint Jezebel, the "hit" off this album is the most ridiculous thing I've heard. And not ridiculous in a stand-up comic type, where it's good..ridiculous in a Jeff Foxworthy way..where it's so terribly bad that even though you get a good laugh out of it, you'd still rather laugh yourself to death (like the guy from Mary Poppins) rather than have to listen to it again. And what gets me is the serious face you know every KMFDM fan has on when they listen to this crap, and the fact that you know they all get on their LIVEJOURNAL or XANGASITE and put up a post that goes somewhat like this:
grrlodeathss2341042
TOTALY HOW I M F33LING 2=nite, FROM KMFDM:
I CAN'T REJECT THIS EMPTY HOLE
I CANNOT COUNT THE BLOODY COST
I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS WRETCHED SOUL
COME PENETRATE ALL THIS LOSS
COME ON AND KILL THIS SENSE OF LIFE
AND BE THE ONE WHO IS DENIED
NOW SHOW ME ONE MORE UPTURNED KNIFE
AND FILL THE EMPTINESS INSIDE
=-{
Come on folks..there's nothing there. He's toying with you, and you buy it. Look at the facts..KMFDM actually put out a couple albums under the name MDFKM, the inverse of their former band name..and tried to pawn it off like another band. OMG IN RESEARCHING THIS I FOUND OUT GARTH BROOKS IS CHRIS GAINES! OMG! OMG! KMFDM can't really be trying to be taken seriously..can they? I mean..this has to be some joke band, right? Like on homestarrunner when they do the whole LIMOZEEN thing? Tell me someone out there has just kept the joke going for far too many albums! Either way, I gotta think the kids with tattooed tears and black make-up and all black KMFDM t-shirts and like..body-bag cut out pants are lookin like the losers of the whole deal. But none moreso than me, because each song reminded me of Pigmy Love Circus, which in turn reminded me of THE SWAMP CREATURE.
Thus concludes it.
